Why do we Hurt the People We Care About

Why do we hurt the ones we care about? Sometimes we're just having a bad day, sometimes we can't explain it. Nobody really ever intentionally wants to hurt someone they care about, but the reality is that it happens and if you're human it makes you feel like crap. One of the biggest blessings in this life is to find someone who understands your ups and downs, because we all have them. While that is no excuse, we aren't perfect and we make mistakes, sometimes some we can't come back from.

We are human and we weren't made perfectly for someone else, it takes hard work, a lot of hard work and dedication, but that's what you do when you care for someone. Often times we tend to see the bad in people  forgetting all the good that's there. I cant emphasize enough, that there are bad people that do bad things and good people that do bad and stupid things. We might not think something we say or do will hurt someone, because maybe it wouldn't hurt you, so you think they won't be hurt by it. The thing to remember is, we are all different, and we all deal with hurt and forgiveness differently, there just needs to be understanding.

Sometimes it's good to take a step back and let the person be hurt and deal with it in their own way instead of trying to fix it right then, then getting mad when they cant just snap out of it. This is something I need to work on and I'm sure many others have this problem. Usually men are fixers and women are listeners, in this case i'm a fixer, because I feel so deeply for people, if I hurt them I want to fix it right away, because I hate seeing people hurt, but what I've realized is sometimes people need time. They won't get over it when you want them to, but they will in their own time. Why we say things sometimes we don't mean, is beyond me, it could be some underlying issue that we don't realize is there. It is never fun when you hurt someone you truly care about and it is never fun getting hurt.

I think sometimes we hurt the people we care about, because they are the ones closest to us and somewhere in our subconscious we think because they care for us, we can lash out on them and they will forgive us. That's not fair for anyone, and is extremely toxic, the sooner you recognize it, the sooner you can fix it. People aren't perfect and we will never be, we are all on a path to recovery and growth. If you ever feel angry write out all your feelings on a piece of paper, just let it all out, it's way better than hurting someone you care for. Words do hurt also.

Sometimes we just have ups and downs, it's apart of life, we take the bad with the good. We all have days when something that wouldn't usually affect us, affects us and we say and do things that we would never usually do. We have different parts to every relationship, different phases, the attraction phase, the getting to know you phase, the first I love you phase and the first real hurt phase, either it will make you or break you, how you handle this will determine where your relationship will go. Show me a relatonship that hasn't experienced some form of hurt and i'll show you two people that don't really care for each other, the one you care about, words and actions carries the most weight.